An Instagram

As I go through work, I’m going to just post random things I think of to help the day go by faster. But I’m going to condense it to all one post because I’ve already posted 5 billion things today.

The best things in life always come when you’re not looking for them.

In this moment I am happy…
“I dig my toes into the sand.
The ocean looks like a thousand diamonds strewn across a blue blanket.
I lean against the wind, pretend that i am weightless and in this moment I am happy.”

I love the way it feels to have my hands on your hips while I kiss you.

I have never felt the need to be so close to someone, ever. I’ve never wanted to kiss someone so much. It kind of scares me.

I’m scared to tell my family I’m gay. But at the same time, I want to just get it over with. But part of me wants to wait until I have a girlfriend so they know I’m actually serious.

After being with a girl though, trust me, I know I’m a lesbian. I mean, ufnnn.

I keep feeling cold air on my arm like a fan is blowing on me, but all of the fans are off. I wish I had a different sweater to wear.

I’m falling asleep right mrow.

I want to get my tattoos.

I think your tattoos are fucking sexy.

My constant need for ice cream lately is secretly making think I’m going to get fat. Yet I know that is simply preposterous.

I’m going to get up and get some coffee and attempt to choke it down

Ugh, this is disgusting…

I wish I was laying in my bed with you right now.

I feel bad you’re always the one coming over my house.

The fact that you’ve slept with more people than me, really doesn’t bother me. You can’t do anything to change someone’s past. All I care about is the present and future.

It hasn’t even been a month yet.

I want to grow my hair out, but not for you. But because I want to dye it pretty colors that would only look good if it was long.

I want to get my navel re-pierced, but I don’t at the same time because I wont be able to be as rough or as snuggley as I want to be with you for a few weeks.

I can’t get enough of you. Your hugs, your kisses, your smile, your laugh, your voice, your everything.

Notice how that at least every other thought is about you?

Why are their paper boats on the wall?

I have only have 3 phone calls thus far. 1.5 hours into my shift.

I keep drinking this horrible coffee just so I stay awake… maybe I should just go to the break room and buy some other type of caffeine…. I can take shots better than I can drink this crap.

I hate that this one girl is white, but she talks like she’s black.

I bet you no one is going to read this… I wouldn’t if I wasn’t me.

There is  bell on my desk, and I really want to ring it… Like one of those hotel bells that you smack the top of to get someone to come help you. I want to hit it soooo bad.

That’s what she said.

I wish my mom wasn’t living with Ray because I want to talk to her tonight, but I don’t want him to be there.

“Sing me to sleep… Sing me to sleeeeeep”

I need to bring The Perks of Being a Wallflower to work with me next week.

So excited for that movie. Paul Rudd. <3

I’m going to the breakroom to get a pop. This coffee is going to make me puke.

Two amazing things. One, I only brought one dollar to the breakroom, only to find out that the bottles of Mountain Dew were $1.25. I looked in the change tray of the machine next to me, and two quarters were sitting in it. I took one, and left the other for the next person.

Second, someone carved “Love is Blind” into the door of the bathroom stall. I thought that was a little strange considering this is a nursing home, but kind of cool at the same time.

I still can’t walk past the room where she died. I don’t know how my mom does it. Both her parents died here, and she spends 5 days a week working here. I wouldn’t be able to do it. Heck, I can barely do it now and it’s been a year and a half. Wow, it’s been a year and a half… Nan, I miss you so much…

I don’t really want to leave on that note… but nothing else really seems important enough to say.
I guess, if you did read this, sorry all you heard about was my completely random thoughts and things about a girl I can’t stop thinking about. This is kind of how my mind runs, except for this is only half of it. I left out all of the gory details. ;)